Although freelance life has many pluses, one of the most common minuses I hear other colleagues talk about is instability. In terms of number of clients, income, workload.
In the months when there is enough activity, when the bank account is replenished with income, everything is fine. But when the current projects are over, suddenly it is empty. And that’s where anxiety and low self-esteem come knocking.
Here I am in a situation where I have fewer activities than I would like, and it is not very easy to talk about it, and I have a lot of internal barriers and beliefs to overcome. After all, if you talk about not doing well, you will be a loser in the eyes of others, you will appear incompetent, potential clients will think “why should we go to a professional who is not doing well?”, Linkedin is full of insanely positive moments and success stories. Did you recognise these thoughts? We talk to ourselves as if we can predict the future by reading other people’s minds, right? Going hand in hand with bottling up all the emotions inside and creating catastrophic scenarios.
For a long time, I was on the side of the barricades where it was acceptable to remain silent. After all, talking about failures is tantamount to humiliation. But with time I realised that carrying this burden alone is far too heavy, and talking about it relaxes and frees up some of the energy that was previously directed towards storing and processing negative thoughts inside. You feel like the loneliest person in the world when you’re accumulating it all, and when you start talking about your problems, you find that other colleagues have been through the same thing, or have been in the same situation over and over again. This is one of the greatest resources we can draw on when we are in a predicament – the experience and support of others.
Unfortunately, I do not have a magic recipe for overcoming the occasional stretch of bad luck. What I can share is what I do – to take a small step every day towards my goal. And the golden rule applies here too – you cannot expect a different result by doing the same thing over and over again. Maybe it will be an email that I dare not send, maybe it will be a request for a favour from a person that I dare not ask for.
So my wish for you is not to be silent, but to speak and act. Take action, even if it is a little at a time.
Best wishes for growth,
Dovilė